[A random evening at home. Husband enters room where wife is using the computer.]
Husband: What are you doing?
Wife: Fartin’ around.
Husband: I thought I smelled something….
[A few hours before husband leaves on a trip.]
Husband: You like nice.
Wife: That’s the idea. I wanted to give you a pleasant visual to remember as you leave.
[Thanksgiving morning. The family is preparing to leave for the gathering they're attending. Mom is on the computer, getting the address of the house where they're going. Mom spent the entire previous evening making three different dishes to take, putting together a gift for the hostess, doing laundry, etc., and has been up since 7:00 or so.]
Kid: Mom, isn’t it time to leave? Why aren’t you doing anything to help?
I am pleased to say this child DID, indeed, live to eat her Thanksgiving dinner. Her eyebrows were a tad scorched by the reply she got to this question, but she did not get clobbered. And I don’t think she’ll be asking such a question again. I hope….